September 8th, 2009
One of the great mystery’s of the modern world is the failure of squash to achieve the sporting preeminence that it so richly deserves. Quite why the International Olympic Committee would prefer to watch scantily clad beach volley ball players rather than marvel at the artistry of our finest players is a question your Captain has long pondered, by the way did you see that Brazilian pair?…eh?…oh…
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January 8th, 2009
As Chair of the club’s “Moral and Ethics Committee” your Captain has adopted a gentle and non-confrontative approach to the disciplinary dilemmas presented by the occasional wayward member. When Greg Vander Koi first joined the club he was famous for his mud caked Wellington Boots, mysteriously encrusted T-shirts and underwear that dated back to the Boer War. A slight mist of sawdust followed his every move on court and a converted chain saw case served as his kit bag. Your Captain’s solution to this most vexing of problems? To introduce Greg to his future wife, the lovely Erin Watkins, whose influence upon his wardrobe has been a marvel to behold.
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December 8th, 2008
The NSC lounge bar has long been one of your Captain’s favorite watering holes. The service is excellent, the price is right and the fine ales, after a grueling match on court, slip down with remarkable ease. Back in the days of monthly bar tabs, Captain Backhand was a regular “high achiever” and his commitment to the bar’s success has, over the years, been unwavering. The infamous “Thursday Night Sessions” are forever etched into the lore of the club and, for that matter, the livers of the assembled members. Happy times indeed and confirmation of the Captain’s view that there is no finer company than a gathering of slightly inebriated squash players.
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December 8th, 2008
A question. What is the connection between the remarkable consistency of your Captain’s year round squash performance and the “peely wally’ all white complexion of his skin? “What the hell is he on about now?” I hear you mutter as your finger twitches over the click button…but wait…read on…for all will shortly be revealed…
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November 8th, 2008
“A wise and just counsel” may well be one of the many epitaphs engraved on your Captain’s headstone when he is finally laid to rest. Over the years I have grown accustomed to approaches by fellow members, bearing their souls and seeking my wise counsel regarding the myriad of dilemmas and problems that beset their off court lives.
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